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first day of school jitters.

January 24, 2012

It’s funny, I don’t even know how many first days of school I’ve had in my life. I guess I could count, but I’m feeling too lazy to do that. Plus it’s complicated since I was homeschooled, those didn’t really feel like the first day of school. All that to say that it’s my first day of school today. I’m feeling tired and not wanting to think about the fact that I’m going to be in class tonight until 10pm. Also, I don’t know what to wear. It’s always so hard choosing an outfit for the first day of school. Decisions, decisions!

My first roommate from college, Allison, and I took pictures on the first day of school every year of college, but for some reason I can’t find the one from junior year. Wah.

We thought we were cool.

I’ve been thinking about what it means to live my life on mission here. Sometimes it’s so easy to forget that I am a missionary no matter where I am. Why is that so easy to forget? I think I was selfish the last 6 months, worried so much about do I fit in and am I happy and how will I get my needs met. Now I want to forget about myself and simply ask the Lord how I can meet others needs. Nowhere in the Bible does it say try so hard to get your needs met and then you’ll be happy. Everywhere in the words of Jesus I hear him telling me to pour out myself for the sake of others and in my emptiness the Lord will fill me. I’ve lived like that before and experienced great blessing, so why does it feel like such a risk now? Lord, fill me with faith to live like this.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Mama permalink
    January 24, 2012 8:37 am

    I remember helping you and Allison settle in at Toledo! I loved your sunset.

    My first week of school was scary. It’s always hard for me until I learn who all my kids are…and I had two new Bible 9 classes.

    “Take my hands and let them move at the impulse of Thy love…”

    I love you!

  2. usedbyyou permalink
    January 24, 2012 9:39 am

    I love your bangs in the last semester. GOOD LUCK.

    PS. We were totally cool doing this. YAY!

  3. January 24, 2012 9:50 am

    …so excited to hear about how this next season of your life unfolds! I know I’m gonna learn stuff from you.

    P.S. Wish you were here…duh.

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